NEVER TALK Lyrics

Black homes never talk

So I grew accustomed to what the lack of a voice felt like

I familiarized myself with suffering in silence

I became a prisoner to brave faces

And a puppet to suicidal ideations

Because depression stepped in for my father

As I watched my mother lash out for the way

unhealed traumas scarred her

It's hard to undo how the wounds of parents

Bleed out onto their children

Just for it become to the baggage they grow up

And carry with them

Watching family ties become undone

Forced into accepting that we could never replace what's missing

I watched people respond to my cries for help with distance

And built barriers where I needed bridges

So silence became my response to every inconvenience

While the volume went up on my demons

I take words lightly because I was raised on broken promises

So I grew numb to false words that encased insecurities into my skin

Making me a foreigner in my own body

On autopilot for months at a time

Detached from my conscious mind

Til poetry became my lifeline

I shut the world out

Til it became the only way for people to know me

Now I'm codependent to poetry

Cemented to my demons

Because what's a poet without heartbreak

And what's a poem without glamorizing trauma

When behind a mic is the only time

I feel safe enough to remove this armor

My deepest heartaches fill these pages

And some make it here with me onto these stages

For the stories of what left me broken to be taken as entertainment

They want front row tickets to hear

The stories that keep me up at night

Just so that they could leave feeling like

They got acquainted with every demon I fight

But I'm numb to it

Got my brain rewired into thinking that this shit is okay

To keep everything bottled up til I step on a stage

Drake said "I made a career out of reminiscing"

So Ima need y'all to clap for my pain

Because if I gotta live with these scars then I might as get paid

Because I put thousands into therapy and got no change

Just a resale of my anxiety

So my self-destructive ways could always rely on me

Now I keep my emotions neglected

Because my vulnerability leads to more misconceptions

And the sound of these demons never turn off

So I'm starting to understand why Black Homes Never Talk