you wouldnt miss this Lyrics

Stare out thru my window

Im searching for something

I know your out there

Don't run away

Its a quarter after one

Why do i always feel alone

Disappointed idk what to do

Or where it all went wrong

Im a mess

I hope i clean it up one day

Cuz im so stressed

And disappointed in myself

I push away

Everyone that love don't stay i feel a million ways

Everyday the same i wanna die

Don't look at me amazed

That mean you aint hearing me

My aunt keep calling asking me if i'm okay

Ill lie right to her face

But i'm miles on miles away

I fake a smile like i'm okay

Yesterday is not today

But i feel the same as i did last week

And i'm on my knees yeah oh

Begging out to the lord that he hear me now

I know we never talk a lot but your on speed dial

I told my dad that i loved him last week

And i cant even get a reply that hurts me

I feel like i'm so fucking dumb & irks me

When i was young i thought this world was for me

But i was naive and narcissistic

Even if i died you wouldn't miss this

Can somebody tell me

Is there something out there oh

I know this aint healthy

But its the only way i know

I need someone to help me

Cause its the only way i know