All I Can Do Lyrics

Feel like I got so much to say to you

But what good is thinking it if I ain't gon' say it too

I've been holding in emotions everyday with you

I barely make it through

It's like only half of me come to visit you

To you the rest of me's is invisible

Stressing bout the things I didn't say or didn't do

It's so hard to be myself I'm just pretending to

I remember the day that I opened up to you

And you opened up to me

About your alcoholism and your addiction

In your house I was sitting on the couch and it started clicking

Old memories start to sound the same

As a story Royce told on a song called "Cocaine"

I was riding shotgun and you were driving

Then we stopped to get gas and you went in to get snacks

Or probably to piss

I took a sip from your drink not knowing what it is

McDonald's cup, it wasn't Sprite or Coke

It was Vodka and I'm only 8 years old

So now it's burning up my nose and down my throat

I spit it out the window I can't stand the fire

I only know that smell as hand sanitizer

That's when they Aidan said it's alcohol

I don't know about that at all

Asked you when you got back to the car

You said it ain't yours it's your co-workers

Looking back on it I bet that you was so nervous

You was lying to us

But I ain't put that together till I was much older

That was your alcohol in the driver's cup holder

But time flew and I grew smarter and less sober

I'm like you but I'm just the part that was left over

Let me be clear I'm not just being judgmental

Cause all I'm really trying to do is to say that I truly get you

And while it's true that I don't know all that you've been through

I do know what it's like to drink your problems out of sight

Cause when you're hiding from your life it's like the alcohol protects you

Please don't think for a second that I resent you

Even though I don't call as much as I'm meant to

You still send the payments when tuition and the rent due

Uh

What does that make our relationship?

How I never ask for money but feel guilty for taking it

But it's less about the money that you're sending through

It's more the fact that I still feel in debt to you as long as I depend on you

I guess I'm begging your pardon cause it's been hard

And I'm not upholding my end of the bargain

I'm falling apart and I put my heart in this art

But when I just try to keep marching I wind up back at the start

Yeah

I tell myself that it's not my responsibility

I need your help but instead it feels like you're guilting me

I'm hurting too so it's hard to have any sympathy

You think I need to hear from you that my sister misses me

Intentionally you message me sentimentally

Mentioning that she tends to be restlessly waiting

And so you sent for me

The part that really gets to me is knowing you can't depend on me

So how can she?

Clear to see the problem but harder to find a remedy

But that's another story for another song

Cause I could go on and on

If I was strong it'd be easy to right my wrongs

But I'm not

So instead of calling you this right here is all I can do