recovering Lyrics

It kinda makes me cringe

Thinking of the things that had a tinge

That hollow red beading up on my arm

Revisit the memory of self-harm

And it's been a while, the scars, white and purple

But it kinda makes me think back

To when the pain was supple

So I won't cover them up, cause they're a part of me

I'll wear them like a necklace, shiny jewels covered in helpless

I kinda wanna open them up so I'd see them bleed

But I've come so far, got past this shit, recovering

So I'd like to go down and say hi

To all the people that are worried, sick, wondering why

All this trouble I've caused

All the friendships I've lost

Cause I know this shit is triggering But I can't help but go back shivering

Sometimes I find a razor

Think I might make it better

No

I don't wanna go back, but sometimes it tugs me

Back in its comforting direction

I know it's not right to fall back into habits

But this time I'm screaming my name as I search through the cabinets

Why does she always have to call me at this time of night when I'm at my loneliest?

Cause then I'm alone and vulnerable Better dial them up on the telephone, I'm terrible

So I won't cover them up, cause they're a part of me

I'll wear them like a necklace, shiny jewels covered in helpless

I kinda wanna open them up so I'd see them bleed

But I've come so far, got past this shit, recovering