Makin' Choices ft. Alkebulaun Lyrics

You ever looked into the eyes of a man marinated in madness

Constantly hearing that fat lady sing, feels like I'm serenaded by sadness

It's real

When love your dad is all I can leave in my will

So I guess, I guess it's the evil forces forcing me to reach for this steel

Pressing this pen to this paper tryna preoccupy my trigger finger

Ends is barely meeting, desperate measure all I'm really thinking

Checking the front page, it's bodies dropping every weekend

Gotta thank the LORD it ain't my body on the corner leaking

Wanna honor my mom and poppa so I'm living decent

Following Ephesians, but it's hard when you see ballers feasting

Lusting for riches, and chickens that flock to foreign cars

Jackers catch you lacking, you know the motto, what's yours is ours

Counting down the minutes and hours until my next check

Locking in this booth, so I won't do something that I'll regret

Stress

Got me contemplating crazy shit

Robbing banks and flipping bricks to guarantee my baby's rich

Gotta stop listening to these voices in my head

Swear these demons tryna push me off the edge

Got me feeling like I'm falling

I'm down for sacrificing all this

Scared money never made money

So I'm all in

Look

Look at the money Bernie Madoff

Made off middle class Americans getting laid off

Look at how life is so hard at times

How these hard times got me thinking bout serving hard at times

But I can't

Cause at the same time I'm too afraid I might get caught

Slippin' that one time

Get locked up by one time

Then sent up state to serve what

Hard time

Frustration is a understatement

See niggas cakin' I'm motivated

Should I work harder to make it

Or jux'em and take it

Self-preservation is a primal law of man

Besides, I promised my daughter's I would do all I can

To provide a paradise

I feel I'm failing miserably

Second guessing if success is really meant for me

Tryna reap what I've sewn on this emotional tapestry

Dodging casualties to transform this drama into a masterpiece

Theater of the mind

Don't want to be a phantom in this opera

So I'll do it how I wanna like Sinatra

And take what I feel is rightfully mine

Something like OJ

Wanna smile and reminisce on how we struggled in the old days

Although my heart is aching

I just fake it like I'm Ok

Getting sick of this job

So I'm plotting on robbing, yo place

But what if there is no safe

Or valuables to capture and I'm captured

So I shake it off and punch the clock the morning after

Why

You think you gonna have the time of your life

In prison, doing time serving life

Let one moment in time leave you frozen in time

Or maybe

Maybe you could push a couple nicks a dimes

And get out the game real quick

Just in the nick of time

But as soon as you start to shine

Even time will start snitching

Hell

Keep flexing with that Rolex nigga

Time will tell

They say it's gangster when you outside of the law

I don't wanna be gangster, just never wanna be poor

The envy in my soul got me caught in the allure

Living evil is a sin, but living righteous is a chore

Making choices got me torn

Between the darkness and the light

Sending praises up to GOD

Cause He bothered to spare my life

Now I'm fighting with all my might

Not to become a statistic

Everyday I'm making choices

Them choices I gotta live with

So tell me what I'm supposed to do

When them bills is overdue

And the landlord keep holding eviction notices over you

Cause time waits for no man

It just weighs on your manhood

That's why we in them back woods puffing backwoods

Got our people moving backwards

That's why I put the truth in word, like a racist black word

Spending time in your cell for them dimes that you sell

Left you blinded and veiled

That's why my hood niggas never go to Harvard and Yale

The hardships that we harvest, feels like it's carved out of hell

The pain on our fingertips, feels like razorblade braille

Life is hard

You know it's hard

You know it's hard when you feel conflicted

Between tryna do right and staying calm, or being convicted

Ghetto conditions got me conspiring on my guns firing

If these jobs ain't hiring

But, these is meager ends

Got me feeling like it's either me, or them

While the heartless, cardiac arrest my development

Yeah

And you hear them innuendos

That means I'm coming straight in your window

Thoughts riddled with the ricochets of the word that the wicked say

Damn

Let us pray