LYING TO MYSELF Lyrics

Yeah

Summer's over, let the rain wash away my sins

Tsunamis couldn't even rinse what you did

But it's okay, girl just keep just what you say

I'm leaving tear stains all over the bed that you and I made

I'm seeing money more and friends less

I wonder if that's what they meant when they said I gotta pay interest

Something that my life lacks lately

Wondering if I picked the right tax agent

To keep my ends straight

Money over everything right, at least that's what my friends say

I know more about my money than my friends day

Or how my friends feeling

I think my most recent text that I replied to was from a Benz dealer

I spend my nights at this museum like I'm Ben Stiller

Never been to Pittsburgh but I've been stellar

Ben steeler

I write some of these bars just for an ego boost

I ain't some rapper that's gone talk about what he gone do

I push my power forward like what Hedo do

I draft well in the seventh round, I don't need to lose

Pressure every time I pick the pen up

I raise the bar and did chin ups

Nowadays I'm pissed and if I can't get the ball and get my Billups

I can't just let em screw with my drive like Phillips

I'm an uncle and I never even met my nephew

I been meaning, I'm just so forgetful

My life is so eventful

Between the drunken nights alone and the studio

It's so suspenseful

Real, edge of your seat flows

I used to spend my nights tryna deceit hoes

Or meet goals

And now she tryna leak those

Messages from when I was at a peak low

These women dirty I can't ever let em see me weak though

I know that i deserve some of the hate I receive

I'm hoping that I can keep that between you and me

Cause self awareness isn't glorified or normalized

Or whatever buzzword that the internet is enthralled with now

A bunch of fake worry from people that sage burn

And they flip they attention to whatever issue the page turn to

It's my turn to, take notice of the people I hurt too

Something y'all could learn too

I wasn't looking for love, I was looking for somebody I can learn through

And that's the issue

See I was looking for the body of a woman and to body instrumentals

Nothing on my mind, but motha fuck if that offends you

And now I'm picking up the pieces of my actions

I write songs like this simply as distractions

Yo make me feel like I'm doing something bigger than my passions

But I'm-

I'm just lying to myself again

Lying that I saw my friend

Lying that I know my end