DEC'S STORY (Feb 12 2022) Lyrics

It's been a minute since we spoke

It's been a minute since I thought of the rope

The bullet to my head cuz I'd rather be blown

High school sophomore year I'm starting to get known

Haven't seen Nana in years, her grandson growing old

These winter days getting cold

December love but my heart no longer with my soul

She doing drugs but I still love her to the full

You left me, now you fucking with thugs? how can you be so bold?

My family don't like that I cuss in songs, well fuck it

Yeah you got hoes but they three's on and off the court, you not a bucket

You talk all guns and say you tuck it

This girl sixteen with a son all cuz she bust it

Ever since you left I been fucking

Forgot her name in the heat of the moment, so I just called her something

You heard about my hookups so now you call me nothing

But for you to say there was never love, I'd call u bluffing

I know I was over but you gotta keep it on the low

Can't show these hickies on my neck to the other hoes

I'll send in my snap and just flex on my bro's

while they sitting at home just staring at they phone

Crazy a few months ago I felt so alone

Now I feel top dog in this bitch, the studio really my home

Calling shotgun in this shit, I'm higher than these drones

I just got a new bitch, and she love giving me dome

I know you still check my location

I'm sure you'll catch another body out on vacation

Hoping maybe we can talk again soon, I been patient

Been talking to the moon, but I can't tell you what it saying

"Bae you on my dick," well quit playing

I know you and that dude been talking for time so might as well get to dating

I'll sit around and wait a year or two then move on when you forever taken

There's better days ahead, not close with god but I been praying

Yeah, look, I been praying

Only the baddest of them all you'll catch me chasing

The rest I'm on the run from but it just look like we racing

Imma ticking time bomb just been pacing

Now on these instrumentals I don't really like to talk how I feel

Cuz I get too deep then delete the whole ideal

But Imma keep it this time, just to show you how real

Broken hearted boy, it took me months to heal

Now listen

Had the pistol to my head, and the pills in my mouth

Only child so I felt alone, even in the whole house

Didn't wanna put that stress on my momma, so I didn't stay too loud

But that all changed in august when the gun was found

Two weeks later I'm in the hospital stuck in a bed

All because the suicidal thoughts I had

But at the same time boredom was the only thing in my head

Momma reminding me every night to take my meds

Just so her son don't put a bullet in his head

Little does she know my wrist was slit, bleeding red

Lost my bitch, crazy a year ago was when we first met

But now we strangers and she don't give a fuck if I'm upset

But I love my momma for trying

Gave me hugs every night when I felt like dying

And shoutout to my day ones, yeah I'm talking bout' Kyan

Went from high to low like I lost my wings while flying

How deep can I go? I guess this song will tell

Don't worry about me I promise you I'm better now

Cuz if I still had these thoughts this song would've never made it out

And I been happier than ever, at least just for now

Listen closely because if you relate please go find yourself some help

I know your voice quiet, but I promise this the time to yell

And if you ain't worried about your friends dying then only time will tell

It's the ones you least expect that been living in hell