I'm The Greatest Star Lyrics

Listen, I have 36 expressions

Sweet as pie and tough as leather

And that's six expressions more

Than all them Barrymores put together

Instead of just kicking me

Why don't they give me a lift

it must be a plot

'Cause they're scared that I got such a gift

Well I'm miffed

'Cause I'm

the greatest star

I am by far

But no one knows it

Wait, they're gonna hear a voice

A silver flute

They'll cheer each toot

( Yeah, she's terrific!)

When I expose it!

Now can't you see to look at me

That I'm a natural Camille

As Camille I just feel, I have so much to offer

(Hey listen kid I know I'd be divine because ...)

I'm a natural cougher

[coughing sounds]

Some ain't got it, not a lump

I'm a great big clump of talent!

Laugh, they'll bend in half

(Did you ever hear that story about the traveling salesman?)

A thousand jokes

(Stick around for the jokes)

A thousand faces, I reiterate

When you're gifted

Then you're gifted

These are facts I got no ax to grind

Hey, what are you blind?

In all the world so far,

I'm the greatest star

Who is the pip with pizazz?

Who is all ginger and jazz?

Who is as glamorous as?

Who's an American beauty rose,

With an American beauty nose,

And ten American beauty toes,

Eyes on the target and wham

One shot one gunshot and bam?

Hey mister Keeney here I am

I'm the greatest star

I am by far but no one knows it!

That's why I was born

I blow my horn

Till someone blows it

I'll light up like a light

Right up like a light

I'll flicker, then flare up, ah, ah!

All the world's gonna stare up

Looking down you'll never see me

Try the sky 'cause that'll be me!

I can make them cry

I can make them sigh

Some day they'll clamor for my drama

Have you guessed yet, who's the best yet?

If you ain't I'll tell you one more time

You bet yer last dime

In all of the world so far

I am the greatest, greatest star!